“Many thanks for the script I have had a read and absolutely love it, I have performed in Pantos for the last 10 years and this is undoubtedly the funniest script I have ever read!”

Peter Ward, Kingfisher Players, May 2010

“What fun everyone had. Once again an interesting, witty and modern script from Chris Lane. Fascinating: I’m sure a number of societies will be interested in using it (or at least they ought to be)”

NODA SW Regional Councillor


“That was awesome and can I go again tomorrow?”, I overheard a boy saying to his mother as the audience was leaving. He is a perceptive critic. In good panto tradition this show is a generous mix of song and dance, spectacle, audience participation and comic business. …. This is wonderful family entertainment.


“We’re doing a staff panto this year and got a fantastic script from http://www.pantoscripts.me.uk – it’s really funny and the guy who writes them has been brilliant and given us loads of advice via email.” Tim Times Educational Supplement

WELCOME to pantoscripts


I imagine you have been set the awful task of finding a pantomime script that is: 

genuinely funny throughout,

original, up-to-date,

family-suitable, within the scope of amateurs,

not going to cost thousands ,

can be home-printed, edited and filmed at no extra cost,

has local jokes,

and which is already tested in award-winning shows!

 In which case you are in luck AND it will cost you less here than anywhere else. In fact if you are raising charity funds for a cause (like ‘Help the Heroes’) or a school it is totally free. Why? I make my money now from my books and movie screenplays: this is just for fun.

I’m sure by now you have looked at other web-sites and at published scripts and – like the rest of us – found them to be dated, sexist, racist, rude, long, boring and unoriginal.

(Have you seen the site with scripts that feature ‘Dixon of Dock Green’, ‘The Sweeney’ and ‘Allo Allo’?! Seriously!)

Well relax – you are safe here. No ancient TV ‘jokes’ or humour unfit for kids’ yet still funny for the big-kids in the audience!

Award-winning shows in performance all over the world every year. And also in several version to fit your needs: no kids? no men? no scenery? Not a problem – jus let me know!

WELCOME! Chris Lane


N.B. I will reply in a day or two – if you don’t hear then your e-mail was wrong!